New Episodes & Show Notes

Sara. Misasha. Megumi. All three of us are the daughter of one Japanese parent and one White parent each. All three of us had dual citizenship with the United States and Japan at one point. But the trajectories of our citizenship are distinctly different, and only one of us holds a Japanese passport now. Are we all still Japanese?

Today, we speak with Megumi Nishikura, a documentary filmmaker who focuses on stories not often told in our history books, despite their themes impacting so many of us, Japanese or not.

We explore belonging, identity, citizenship, and what history teaches us about where we are now - and the stories we want to carry forward with us.

If you’ve ever wondered if you’ve belonged, or if you’ve ever been told you’re not ____ enough, we hope you listen, and join our conversation.

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What if the very programs designed to make workplaces fairer are actually making the problem worse?

In this episode, we begin with the famous “Cobra Effect”—a colonial-era policy that unintentionally increased the problem it was meant to solve—and explore how the same dynamic shows up in modern diversity, equity, and inclusion efforts.

Our guest, Lily Zhang, argues that many corporate DEI initiatives fail not because the goals are wrong, but because the strategies are. Drawing on decades of research, Lily breaks down why performative programs, surface-level solutions, and “band-aid” workplace initiatives rarely create real change—and what leaders, employees, and communities can do instead to build truly fair organizations for human beings who deserve better.

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Today’s conversation is one about history — but also about now. About 1968 and about 2026. About who gets control over their own body — and who never truly has. About the quiet, complicated ways parents try to protect their children, and the unintended harm that can hide inside “what’s best.” About the tension between safety and freedom. Between acceptance and autonomy. Between love and control.

We’re so excited to talk with a podcast favorite, Kate Schatz, about her new book Where The Girls Were, in today’s episode, and we REALLY dive into everything we mentioned above, and more. If this resonates, please share - we think this is a book and conversation that everyone should be having and reading right now.

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Here we are, February, which is also Black History Month (and for the record: Black history is American history. We’ll say this all day, every day, until everyone gets on this train.). It’s not lost on us that this is the shortest month of the year. It’s also not lost on us that, currently, our administration is actively erasing or whitewashing our nation’s history in real time, including this month itself, and we are being gaslit in the process.

So, this Black History Month, we encourage everyone out there to take a moment to learn our real history, expand the narrative of Black excellence in our country, and actively question the racist tropes and more subtle - yet still overt and noticeable - rewriting of history that is taking place. Many things can be true at once, including fear and the need to not stay silent. Listen in to hear more about what we think about that and simple ways to get these conversations started.

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IHorns honking, people chanting ICE OUT as they crowd busy intersections.

Horns honking, ICE agents smashing car windows, and grabbing people from their cars.

Which scenario sounds like the America you know? 

Which one, more importantly, sounds like the America you want to be fighting for?

Regardless of what you answered, this episode is a must-listen. We unpack the history of ICE (it’s not a long one, despite what might be suggested by our current administration), why ICE acting as the secret police for the administration is not only incredibly illegal today but also reminds us of another secret police which rhymes with Schmestapo, and what we can all DO about ICE in our communities, especially when it seems like we have no agency.

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If you’re a repeat listener to the podcast over the last almost SEVEN years, you know that sometimes, we’ve done seasonal arcs in which we focus on a topic or theme for the season. (And if you’ve just found us - hello!) 

This year, we’re doing something different: a year-long focus on action, which is the third pillar of our listen, learn, and act framework. It moves us from “what can I do?” to “here’s how I show up.” 

We’ll take the things that you’ve been curious about (but didn’t want to ask about, maybe), break down the history behind them, and walk you through why these things matter. 

And then we’ll throw in tips on how, now that you know about them, you can make small changes in your own lives to make a huge impact in your communities and in the fight for all of us. 

We’re in it to win it this year. Hope you’ll come along for the journey.

Welcome to 2026, and a whole new year of What Do You Mean By That? - the podcast about asking better questions, having deeper conversations, and taking action that helps all of us. Make sure you’re signed up for our newsletter to catch all the details in between.

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We’ve had rough years before—but 2025? This one hit different. 

If you’ve been listening to us for the last six years, you know we’re no strangers to hard conversations. DEI. Wellbeing. Systems that don’t work the way they should.

And this year pushed all of that—from the global to the deeply personal.

So what did we learn when everything felt heavier than usual?

Let’s talk about the biggest lessons this year forced us to learn - what we’re leaving behind in 2025, and what we are carrying forward, with purpose, into 2026.

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In today’s episode, we sit down with feminist author and activist Soraya Chemaly for a conversation that feels both urgent and deeply grounding. Soraya’s new book, All We Want Is Everything, traces how male supremacy shows up everywhere—our politics, our homes, our faith spaces, our workplaces, and especially in the lives of our children.

Together, we talk about the rising backlash against women and queer people, the ways boys are being pulled into misogynistic online spaces, and why so many young men are drifting toward anti-democratic movements without even realizing they’re being manipulated. Soraya offers a powerful reframe for what we’re seeing culturally, along with real, everyday actions that families can take to disrupt old gender scripts—on sports fields, around dinner tables, and in the tiny moments we rarely name but constantly repeat.

This conversation is challenging, hopeful, beautifully honest, and filled with the clarity that can actually shift how we move through the world.

Let’s dive in.

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In an age where AI can fake a video, social platforms reward outrage, and even the word ‘misinformation’ means different things to different people, one question rises above the noise: how do we know what to trust? 

Today, we’re joined by Vanessa Otero, the lawyer-turned-media-analyst behind Ad Fontes Media and its well-known Media Bias Chart, to explore exactly that. Vanessa takes us inside the mechanics of bias, the structures driving extreme content, and the habits that actually make us smarter news consumers. This episode is your practical guide to staying informed without getting manipulated.

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Are you a little worried about holiday conversations with your relatives and family members in this increasingly polarized political climate? You’re not alone.

Welcome to something new – a live discussion with our guest, Dr. Bill Doherty, co-founder of Braver Angels and a deeply experienced relationship therapist, coaching one of us (Sara) through how to have difficult conversations, not in theory, but with an actual extended family member who has differing political viewpoints from me.

Nowadays, politics is personal. So, as much as it's tempting to bury our heads in the sand, these conversations are skills of democratic living - we can’t abandon them at a family level and expect our political leaders to do it for us. 

You won’t want to miss the discomfort, the realizations, the tips and perspectives that can help us ALL have better, more meaningful connections and conversations with the people we love in our lives – even and especially if we don’t always agree with them.

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When we have repeat guests back on the pod, it’s because we love them, their work, and the message that they’re not only sending out into the world but embodying themselves. And we think all of this can be said a million times over for today’s guest and her brand new book (out today!).

As we think about this conversation, which we can’t wait for you to listen to, there were those mic drop moments, but there were also those contemplative moments where we were not only deep in conversation, but we really felt the power of this notion of uncompeting. We can’t wait for you to feel this too, as you listen to our conversation with Ruchika Malholtra about her new book Uncompete and why we should all be redefining success together.

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Welcome to our first Debrief episode, where we reflect and digest what our brilliant guests shared in a prior conversation. 

We were blown away by the sheer brilliance and clarity in our last episode with former litigator and political commentator Elie Mystal, author of Bad Laws and Allow Me to Retort. We’ve read and recommend both books, and especially want Bad Laws to get in the hands of our Democratic lawmakers for whenever (fingers crossed) they get back in power. 

But say you don’t have time or desire to go back and listen to a full hour of incredible insights. We pulled out some of the key quotes that hit us hard, and we’re gonna get into our thoughts on them.

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This episode is a must-listen for anyone who’s ever felt like legal talk is impossible to understand (👋 Sara included!). We’re joined by Elie Mystal,  brilliant legal mind, powerful truth-teller, and New York Times bestselling author of Allow Me to Retort: A Black Guy’s Guide to the Constitution, to break down the complex world of American law and what Democrats are doing all wrong (and can do better) in a way that’s sharp, accessible, and even funny.

💥 He’s back with a bold new book: Bad Law: Ten Popular Laws That Are Ruining America. If you're fired up about the state of our country, about policy that is working frighteningly as intended, or simply want to understand how certain laws are quietly shaping (and harming) everyday life, this conversation is for you.

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Whether you’ve ever been a boss or have ever had a boss, you know how much those singular individuals can shape the workplace. According to studies, a good manager can increase employee engagement by as much as 70%. And, according to a survey by the American Psychological Association, a whopping 75% of employees report their boss as the worst and most stressful part of their jobs.  

So, how do we know if we’re being a good boss or a bad boss?  Do we just know, or should we be looking out for specific things?

Enter the incredible stories that focus on what good leaders can learn from bad bosses, featuring the author of the brand-new book, The Devil Emails at Midnight, Mita Mallick.

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We had a very insightful superfan make a brilliant suggestion that we’re acting on, starting with this episode. David Gaines, author of Radical Business, CEO of La Terza Coffee, and kind human being, sent in a message cheering us on for the podcast rebrand, and then pushed us to do just a bit more. Specifically, he said, “The guests you have on clearly have their brilliance to add to the world, but for me personally, the main reason I listen to your work is that I find a lot of brilliance in your perspectives as you process in real time what your guests are saying.”

Considering that while we are deeply curious human beings who are pretty darn good at interviewing people, we are ALSO speakers who very much have our own brilliant perspectives - his words, not ours - too.  So, David, thank you. We’re going to weave in more episodes with our thoughts, reflections, and actions based on what we learn from our guests going forward! 

In addition, this fall, we’re working on something new for our newsletter subscribers, so make sure you’re subscribed to be the first to hear about it!  

And if you’re more of an audiophile, based on the fact that you’re listening to this podcast, take a moment to check the link below to leave an audio recording of your feedback on how we can make this podcast the best it can be for YOU!

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In our last episode of our series on how to be a better human, we’re talking about rest. Specifically, what do we mean by rest, and why is it so important? How do we grapple with its significance in our individual and collective lives, and for real, how do we DO LESS?

This conversation has become increasingly frequent in our lives, and we wanted to share our thoughts with you. If this resonates, please share with your friends, and tell us how you incorporate rest, in whatever form, into your lives as well.

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Maybe these are some questions you’ve asked yourself, as we’ve moved from the election of 2024 to the present: Where the heck are the Democrats?  What’s happening with the dysfunctional American two-party political system, and if we don’t support what the Trump administration is doing to our people and our rule of law, how do we find any hope we might have left for regaining control of our Democracy? What do we even mean when we say Democrat these days?

We’ve asked ourselves the same questions and have come up empty. As a result, we decided to ask these very same questions of a Democratic insider, as this week we discuss how to be a better Democrat.

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It’s not controversial to say that we are living in times of deep division, where there are so many forces keeping us apart, politics being a big part of that.  But did you know that there’s a link between how satisfied you think you are with your life, how much you trust others, and how you vote? It’s a mind-blowing, less-discussed topic, despite being a chapter in the latest World Happiness Report. Importantly, to make a difference, we wonder this - how do we actually build trust with people who hold different viewpoints, especially if our first impulse is to block them, disregard their comments, or ignore them entirely?

We’re so glad today to have one of the co-authors of the World Happiness Report here to talk with us about how we can use our understanding of wellbeing and trust to build stronger communities, reconnect with each other, and also bridge the politics of division.

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Depending on who you are and where you get your news from, you may be seeing a completely separate version of the news from your neighbor down the street, your aunt in another state, or your coworker who only gets his news from a specific social media platform. Maybe everyone around you gets the same news you do. But you also know that there is a very different version of reality out there, that many people are deeply believing in.

So, how do we figure out what’s true and what’s convenient? How do we talk to each other if we don’t have the same baseline of understanding about, perhaps, anything? We’d argue that this is where critical thinking skills come in. But what do you mean by critical thinking skills? 

We’re glad you asked. This episode is for anyone who wants to think deeper about what we mean when we say critical thinking skills and how we can use them to bridge the divides in our communities, our country, and maybe even in our own households.

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This is Sara, and I remember the time 20 years ago when I got schooled by a psychoanalyst.  It must have been the fall, because I was supremely agitated that I was having to write, design, and send holiday cards out to a huge list of people all by myself, without the help of my fiancé.  If you know me, you know that cards were a staple of my winter growing up, with cards from my parents’ friends stapled onto long felt ribbons hanging down each doorway, surrounding us with love and smiling faces for weeks on end.  The therapist asked if I could just not do them, if it was annoying me so much, and my instant fury was revealed: Are you kidding? I have to send these cards out, it’s the nice thing to do!!  Cut to the point, and it’s this - nice according to who?  Nice for whom?  Certainly not nice for me, if I were going to be resentful and pissy about it.  I came to terms with the fact that I actually just really enjoyed writing and sending cards out to people who warmed my heart that year, and that my partner wasn’t a nice person for not agreeing to send these cards out with me.

But it leads us to ask this.  What do we mean by niceness - and what, more importantly, is its not-as-related-as-it-seems and so much more important character trait of kindness?  How can understanding this difference and leaning into kindness help us be better people?

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